Today was a day of "cleansing" I guess you could call it. I purged a lot of things, heart things, head things, gut things, it was pretty exhausting to be honest. I know you all love it when I fart sunshine but today's not one of those days. Some days are good and some days are bad and today was a really bad day.
But....I'm ok.
Thanks to my family and friends that took time to talk to me and listen to me and give me some great feedback I know that I can get through this. It's all part of the process, unfortunately this isn't my 1st rodeo but this one really hurts, it's been gut wrenching few days as the reality of it has hit me and I'm doing my best to work through it. We were a family and my children love him and he loves them and never wanted anything but the best for both of them. He's very proud of them and I hope they both know that. He's a good dad. He deserves their love and I hope that they will continue to have a relationship with him because what happens between him and I is just that, it's between him and I. I hope they can find common ground without me as the common demoninator and I hope that Gabe and Kaden are able to grow up knowing him as their papa because he will be forever their papa. If word of this particular blog gets back to you, Don, I hope you realize that Michael and Ashley are really gifts to you, not from me, but from God and I hope that you can see past me to realize that they love you and you are very much a part of their lives.
Heading to bed early tonight, lots of tears fell today and my eyes feel like sandpaper. Can't believe I'm going to say this but I'm glad tomorrow is Monday and I get to go to work, a welcomed distraction.
I hope you all have a great week! I'm going to focus on getting back to good eating and working out this week. I dug out my workout DVD's and jump rope and aerobic step and hand weights...craving it, can't wait for it...there's just something awesome about kicking your own as* while getting all sweaty and I need it.
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